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Kayak Trip Day 44: Ercsi to Dunaújváros
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Kayak Trip Day 5: Sigmaringen to Mengen + Munderkingen
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Arriving in Porto - Kitten Rescue in Portugal, Part I
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The Best Maps of Rodrigues Island, Mauritius
Belarus Is The Dream: 29 Pleasant Summer Days
Kayak Trip Day 17: Friesheim to Straubing
Chajnantor Observatory, Chile

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caspian sea

caspian sea mazandaran iran persia hitchhiking swimming hijab head scarf

Modest Swimming in the Caspian Sea

23rd October 201417th January 2021 Iris Veldwijk

#CaspianSea! #Mazandaran

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irisveldwijk

The bridge of bridges 🌉 🌁 thanks for taking me to

The bridge of bridges 🌉 🌁 thanks for taking me to this ICONIC place, M! Mind truly blown. (6 October 2026, day 31)

As my life as I knew it of 11 years recently got uprooted, I had to improvise. Part of me wanted to return to being the 24-year-old solo female hitchhiker. But that wouldn't be growth, I guess. And the lack of growth was one of the reasons to leave that dynamic. I want something completely new and unfamiliar. Breaking the pattern.

Some days I have incredible clarity on this, other days are more foggy.

I've planted the seed for more time in the Bay Area. I'm careful about naming it. What's happening. A kitten in a beautiful home is crawling over me, purring, as I'm writing this. There are invitations for the future, both near and far. I invite people too, but I'm still only planning ahead for five days. We go out and explore things together. We encourage each other to be bolder, talk to that person, be forward as hell. No one is tearing another down. Ambition isn't a dirty word.

I've not laughed like this in such a long time. Or perhaps I've never laughed like this at all. It's new.

I'm building several bridges at once, hoping the other side will meet me in the middle. And knowing full well that the maintenance burden of so many bridges might be unmanageable down the road. So far? I have the capacity for this. I'm a builder at heart. Always have been.

Sometimes people don't meet me in the middle. Those are the ones that can't build, are intimidated, stuck in the past, or simply incompatible. Good. Endings are good. Those people would've been my old pattern anyway. At least they didn't set a completed bridge ablaze.

It's been 10 days now since these photos. I've gained even more perspective and clarity. I love San Francisco and the Bay Area. Thirteen years of travel and ninety countries later, this is where it's at. Perhaps I'm on the cusp of something big. Let's make it happen!

Necessary update because people are finding my IG

Necessary update because people are finding my IG and looking at my #sadcore posts from a while ago. How am I? I've never been better. Not exaggerating.

It's day 31 in the Bae Area for me. I am surrounded by highly-motivated people who worked hard to leave their country to be here and either earn that bag and/or not squander the opportunities this locus* provides.

My being here is a glitch, a fluke. Something. And everyone is so extremely nice about my lack of qualifications and being a (good 👉👈) tourist. I'm fully aware I'm still wearing the rose-tinted glasses, but in 90 countries (including two prior visits to the US), I've never felt this way about a place before.

My dearest loves... the people here!! I've had a bunch of experiences that have made me feel wanted, loved, inspired, and confused. The lore is building up fast. I am juggling a million things, but apparently I have the capacity for this? Only time will tell. The pendulum might swing the other way again.

One friend makes all my America-maxxing dreams come true. Another person wants to send a thank-you-for-fumbling-Iris postcard to my ex. And then... there's the change in the mission.

The validation-seeking phase is over. I am validated through and through. So while my spreadsheet tells me I've been on 28 dates since my arrival, my strategy has changed and most of those have been 2nd, 3rd, or more dates. Yesterday I officially bumbled too close to the sun, when a match recognized me at an SF Tech Week event. I should stop wearing a name tag.

Perhaps something is brewing. I don't know what yet, but I've found that being 100% honest and direct around the clock works. And I'm vigilant of dynamics of old.

The main mission has now become the side quest. The person I'm trying to help with their scamming situation refuses my help, so I started focusing on work (join us for the 2027 total solar eclipse!) and cats.

You can't help people who don't want to be helped, which is how I ended up being single at 35 and happier than ever. Unburdened and unleashed. The freest person you'll ever meet.

Thank you for fumbling me

*Absolutely everyone tells me to go to New York City, though. Then invite me!

It hurts. (8 August 2026) But I'm doing my own th

It hurts. (8 August 2026)

But I'm doing my own thing without constant discussion and criticism. There are a lot of things I've learned since the 6th of September 2015. One of them is that a finding a good partner who treats you well doesn't mean a thing. They can absolutely turn around and actively decide to become a piece of shit. Someone who abandons all their principles and goes from being your dream human being to your biggest enemy.

Everyone always says "Just find a good [insert gender]". I'd found one who was a much better partner than my other two long-term relationships. Perfect, in a sense. The alignment was insane.

Finding a good partner is no guarantee they'll stay good. I don't believe you can fake this for a solid 8.5 years. I've tried to explain it away: midlife crisis, depression, brain injury. Or perhaps plain cruelty.

They neglected and then refused to fix things while I kept working. I went from carrying 50% of the relationship to carrying 100% over the course of about 2.5 years. Mentally and physically, I've been set ablaze.

Outwardly, I kept pretending everything was fine. I protected their reputation (something you might have noticed I'm done with). That adds to the loneliness. Talk to friends, my loves. Don't stay silent.

Love yourself first and foremost. I'm an excellent navigator and even I got fucking lost on this road I chose in life.

What a waste of my capacity for love.

📸 in Aguilar de Campoo (Spain) on some hill overlooking the village. I'd just spent the night following my feelings doing whatever I wanted and exploring things in a way I haven't in over a decade. I've gone to Hades and back and it's been a ride.

#roughbreakup #abusiverelationship #midlifecrisis #digitalnomad #hitchhiker

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